or McGarrertt & Danno…
the continuing saga of middle-aged parents raising twins…
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or McGarrertt & Danno…
Today was “shot day” for the boys. Today’s vaccinations include oral polio, Hib, HepB, and Rotavirus. A necessary evil, of course, but we’re not looking forward to the next couple of days. Last time they didn’t do too well, especially Alex, who spiked a 102° and was generally feeling pukey for two days. Anyway, we arrived at the immunization clinic just before they reopened after lunch, so we spent a few minutes exploring the hallway and pushing the stroller around making the obligatory race car noises that seem to amuse a child of any age. We checked-in and a few minutes later, the tears were gone and twins were vaccinated. The exercise was certainly more traumatic for the parents than the bambinos.
After the shots, we went to Ruby Tuesday’s for lunch. Let me rephrase that: “We went to Ruby Tuesday’s to feed the kids their lunch.” It was actually pretty funny. The restaurant was practically empty. There were 5 or 6 tables with customers eating, and wouldn’t you know it, the waitress seats us right-smack-dab-in-the-middle of all these people. It was a bit cramped, and I’m sure more than a little annoying to the businesswomen sitting just inches away from Alex’s bulky sling chair. It sounded like this was a working lunch for them, and Alex just couldn’t help, evidently, giving them some advise on raising next quarters sales revenue (he was so loud, he had to be talking to someone at another table).
So, we’re already mixing their cereal and bottles when the waitress comes to take our order: crab cakes for me, and those mini-hamburgers for Cindy, and two salad bars. We also ordered some chips and guacamole that arrived as we were feeding the boys their cereal. Our meals arrived as we were feeding the kids their bottles. I ate left-handed, as my dominate hand was otherwise occupied holding Alex’s bottle. Cindy had a better time of it because Adam is able to hold his own bottle now (although he wasn’t too interested in holding it in the restaurant). After the bottles we had our salads, then packed-up to go feeling a bit rushed after the experience. At least I did…Cindy and our nanny, Miss Hannah, do this all the time!
After weeks of struggle, battling the elements and wild beasts, Adam crawls out from the savage jungle…and falls asleep.
“Are you IDENTICAL or FRATERNAL?”
It’s really amazing (and extremely funny) the questions people-on-the-street ask when meeting the twins. They’re real-life “Here’s Your Sign” moments. Here are a few of our favorite questions, and our typical answers…
No. Just this one.
No. One has longer hair.
No. It was a virgin birth.
Yes, but usually they learn to walk, first. They’ll probably jump and climb, too
I just look at them.
Well, we had sex twice that night, so we thought we had a pretty good chance.
Well, there was this one time in Majorca…
No, they’re plastic!
Well, I was there for the birth! But I guess the doctor could’ve pulled a fast one.
No, just twins.
Neither, they’re both equally bad!
No. Twins can’t hear each others cries because they communicate with their special telepathic language only.
Sometimes I cry; sometimes I go to Starbucks.
Yes. Would you like to make a donation?
Why? Are you offering to clean my house?
Thanks. Just this morning I woke up hoping to receive a word of discouragement while simultaneously pushing a stroller and pulling a shopping cart through Wal-Mart. Have a nice day. 😛
Thanks to the many parents of multiples who provided some of these snappy answers…
The boys are 6-months old now, and are much easier to manage solo these days. In fact, Cindy is on her own with the babies most of the week. Instead of their nanny, Miss Hannah, coming over every day, she only comes a couple of days a week and Friday night–date night. On date night, Hannah arrives about 5:30 pm, and gives Cindy and I a night out on our own. Last night, we met some friends for dinner at Ruby Tuesday’s and took in a movie, “The Hangover” (which was hilarious, by the way!). We had a great time, despite a little mishap just before Hannah arrived. Alex and Adam were playing on the bed in the master bedroom, and Cindy and I were getting ready. Both of us thought the other was watching the kids when Alex, who is beginning to motor everywhere, rolled off the edge of the bed. Luckily, babies bounce! Anyway, he squealed for a bit in his mother’s arms, but was otherwise okay. And wouldn’t ya know it, we set him back on the bed, and he takes off for the edge again (this time he didn’t make it! :-)).
We returned home about 10:30 pm to a “non-eventful” report from Hannah, although Adam, it seems, stayed up a little later than he normally does (ordinarily, both kids are asleep by 8, but this night, Adam was up ’till about 9). No problem. We talked for a bit with Hannah, and she took-off for home. Cindy and I had a drink over conversation, and retired about 12:30 am. Then…
** FLASHBACK **
The boys are one-month old and waking up every couple of hours, which Adam did last night! At 1:30, 3:30 and 5:00, Adam was awake. First, he just needed his “passy,” so it only took a minute or two to get him back off to sleep. The next time required a small bottle and some rocking, which lasted a bit longer. The third time, Adam brought his brother into the act, and both required diaper changes and some cuddling. Anyway, the night was pretty much shot, and neither Cindy nor I got much sleep.
Now, it’s almost 9:00 pm, and the boys have been asleep for about an 1-1/2 hours. Cindy and I are getting ready for bed. Hopefully, the boys, Adam especially, have a good night sleep.
Alas, because if they (he) don’t (doesn’t), neither will we! 😉